Yup yup yup. Everyone, this is Simmy and I love him but he won’t give me his tumblr URL like a whoreface.

IT IS AUDREY OR TRISTA’S LAPTOP I THINK

Also we have had a phone conversation since and such and yes you are in fact Simeon.

CASE CLOSED

The mystery that was “Ashby Daugherty and the Anonymous Man or Woman” has been solved! c:

I also enjoy looking at the magnificence that is Neil Patrick Harris How I Met Your Mother.

This is the moment that I begin to suspect that Simeon Estes is the culprit to this crime.

Ryan Neef.

Or maybe Maximum Peril?

Uh okay. Whelp.

I feel as the hero of a mystery novel I would be the biggest failure you ought to use someone awesome instead and also who are you

WAIT

WUT

NO I HAVE NO PAPERS TO WRITE

ARE YOU KIDDING

IIIIIIIIIT’S SPRING BREAK! GIRLIES RUNNING WILD! JAMMIN’ AT THE BEACH IN THE FRESHEST STYLES!

…BALLS ON THE QUOTE. AND YES. OHIO STATE. YOU GO THERE, EMMA. I’VE SEEN YOU AROUND.

AND BY “SEEN YOU AROUND” I MEAN WE’RE KIND OF FRIENDS AND I’M PRETTY SURE I CALLED YOU LAST NIGHT.

Okay, so. Not an OSU student (or one that doesn’t get out often), quotes PotC, likes Homestar, and is up at late hours.

Are you, perchance, a Northmont student?

I KNEW IT

YOU CLEVER BASTARD

but seriously who is this I’m trying to decide if i want you to come and eat in that establishment with me or not

WHO ARE YOU AND THIS IS SLOOPY’S DINER

THIS IS LEGIT LIKE THE 10TH SLOOPY’S PIC I’VE POSTED ON THIS BLOG. GO LOOK FOR PICS OF MILKSHAKES AND TABLETOPS AND FOOD AND ME EATING AND SHIT AND YOU’LL BE IN THE GENERAL AREA

ALSO WHO IS THIS SERIOUSLY

IF IT’S BRITTANY I WILL TAKE YOU BUT YOU DON’T GET PIZZA IN THAT CASE

THIS IS THE OPPOSITE END OF CAMPUS FROM BOTH PIZZA AND MY DORM

SO YOU WILL DECIDE

(unless you’re around forever, then I can take you to cool places and show you around and it’ll be awesome)