a drunken maroon: Archive

Jan 1st

10 tags

Insomnia Strikes Area Man

About an hour and a half ago, a local man, age 19, made plans to go to bed but never went through with them. Ashby Daugherty, of Clayton, Ohio, had made plans on going to bed before two in the morning, but somewhere in the past hour and a half he has instead managed to read the entire history of a fictional civilization, lose his pants, and belt hit showstoppers from Broadway’s Wicked, as...

Dec 30th

11 notes

1 tag

i swear one day i will be a quality blogger again...

Dec 28th

12 notes

1 tag

ass titties ass and titties

herrashmoo: assass tittiestitties ass and titties man this was really the only reasonable way to test out a new keyboard

Dec 25th

5 tags

I'M THE BARD OF RAGE MOTHERFUCKERS

aw yeeeeeeeeeeeee fuck yes

Dec 25th

1 tag

merry christmas, guys!

Here’s your gift! http://oscarchristmas.tumblr.com Just go there. Do it. It’s uh. It was part of Trista’s Christmas thing, so it’s a little derpy and “hurr I liek you” but otherwise it should be pretty cool for your general use so give it a spin and don’t hate me! :D

Dec 25th

2 notes

4 tags

Dec 24th

152 notes

Dec 24th

4,909 notes

4 tags

“And God told Adam, “I will fashion a companion for you. She will have apple...”

– Genesis 5:6 (via iappropriatelylovethefool) And Adam unto the Lord, “yea, and them baggy sweatpants and the Reeboks with the straps, could she turn around and give that big booty a slap?” (via ultraprism)

Dec 24th

512 notes

4 tags

Dec 24th

5 notes

2 tags

letsplaycupid reblogged your photo: vondell-swain: vernalized: nnooo no i am… ^^ I always want to flail my arms about during those two seconds. I always want to not piss myself during those two seconds Apparently, I scream during them But I have no self-awareness for those two seconds, just the visual of plummeting to the ground without being attached to anything and it’s...

Dec 24th

2 tags

Dec 24th

109,746 notes

2 tags

Dec 23rd

26 notes

4 tags

Dec 23rd

2,356 notes

7 tags

Dec 23rd

1,399 notes

5 tags

zoeybodypillow:

Dec 22nd

570 notes

5 tags

Dec 22nd

957 notes

2 tags

DAVE: when i was really young DAVE: he made this stupid leather bib for me out of a goddamn horse DAVE: for the ironies obviously ROSE: Was that the one you mentioned had a pink heart on it? DAVE: yeah ROSE: Hmm. DAVE: what ROSE: It’s just that with the clarity afforded by my new abilities, it occurred to me just now that dead horse was likely the beautiful pet pony my mother gave me...

Dec 21st

4 tags